Saturday, February 19, 2011

Parents perspective--You're now in the closet

I know parents sometimes will find out that their child is gay/lesbian and go into hiding. And it makes complete sense why you go into hiding. As a parent, you want the best for your child. And now that you know something about your child that is so different from what you've always wanted and hoped for your child, you 've gone into hiding. Don't worry about having gone into hiding. It makes sense why you have. It always takes a long time before you are ready to come out to your friends as a parent of a child who is gay/lesbian.

Think of it this way. Your gay/lesbian child went into hiding after they realized that they were gay/lesbian. They spent a lot of time in that closet playing with those hangers, and trying to figure out how everything fit together to make sense. Your gay/lesbian child had a lot of questions they asked. And once they found the answers to their questions, everything began to make sense and come together. It isn't easy being in the cloest. But after spending some time in the closet, everything begins to make sense.

I literally spent about six to seven years of my life in the closet. And it wasn't the best six to seven years of my life. I was in late middle school/early high school when I went into the closet. My biggest issue was fear. I was scared of how my parents would react when I came out. I was scared of how my friends would react when I came out. I was really scared of the possiblity that nobody would be supportive. And that's something that I lived with for six or seven years. After a while I was no longer scared of the reaction of my friends or family. I had come to realize that no matter how the people around me reacted to my coming out, I would always be the same person I had always been.

Think of it this way: the only difference between now and before you knew your child is gay/lesbian is that you know what sex they are attracted to. Other than that they are the same exact person that they were before.

Don't give up on life just because you are gay/lesbian or because your child is. I know just how many questions you might have about it. But that doesn't mean that you should give up on life. Life will get better. I'm living proof. My life has gotten so much better.

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